Many years ago, I read a magazine article written by a mother who was trying to find a full-time babysitter for her children. She was going back to work, and she had very high standards for the person who would care for her children. Among other traits, the babysitter would have to be kind, firm, fair, loving, honest and, above all, must have the ability to love the children in her care as if they were her own. Applicant after applicant was interviewed, but they were all turned down. Nobody fit the profile. Eventually, this woman realized that the person she was looking for was herself. And that, she said, was why “such an intelligent woman like her” was at home looking after her children.

I loved this article, as it highlighted not only the general attitude of society toward a mother’s occupation, but also the fact that a mother cannot be replaced by a babysitter or childcare worker, no matter how talented and competent.

“There is no other who can accomplish the mother’s work for her. Neither nurse nor governess can supply the mother’s place, or fulfil her obligations.”1

The really sad thing about today’s society is that motherhood is viewed as a career break. You read about a mother “putting her career on hold” to raise her children, and of mothers “resuming their careers” when their children are grown. Let me say something that should be self-evident: Motherhood is a career. A woman’s life is not “on hold” until the business of raising a family is over; motherhood is her life. Even if a woman does get a job or go back to college when her children are in school or grown, she never relinquishes the job of motherhood. Motherhood demands a lot from our talents and abilities, as one mother stated: “I looked on child-rearing not only as a work of love and duty, but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honorable profession in the world, and one that demanded the best that I could bring it.”

Women have a lot of skills that are unique to her gender: “multitasking,” sympathy, emotional bonding, and so forth. We were purpose-made by God to be mothers. It has been said: “Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.” The women’s liberation movement, which fought for women’s rights, did a lot of good. It established that a woman is equal to a man in worth, intellect, and capability, and it granted her the same rights that a man enjoys. We are indebted to the liberation movement for the acknowledgement that just because we are custom-built for child-rearing, it doesn’t necessarily follow that we have to be mothers, or that we are incapable of carrying out any job other than homemaking. Unfortunately, the movement was a little over-enthusiastic, and as a result of the liberation effort, the esteem once given to the occupation of motherhood was snatched away. This is a pity, as it really didn’t have to end up like that. One mother put it this way; “Women do not have to sacrifice personhood if they are mothers. They do not have to sacrifice motherhood in order to be persons. Liberation was meant to expand women’s opportunities, not to limit them. The self-esteem that has been found in new pursuits can also be found in mothering.”

However, it is so easy for us busy mothers to adopt the perception that our intelligence and talents are seemingly dormant and unused—maybe even wasted—when we devote ourselves to homemaking. After the novelty of motherhood wears off, we are faced with the endless routines of feeding, bathing, hair-brushing, dishwashing, and cleaning. We expend so much time and energy on home duties that we don’t have the chance to pursue our interests and hobbies and, as a result, we tend to lose our identities. I am speaking from experience, as I, too, have felt frustrated and trapped while rotating on the child-care/housekeeping merry-go-round. Motherhood seems to be a messy, tiring, 24-hour job that attracts very little appreciation.

“The mother seldom appreciates her own work and frequently sets so low an estimate upon her labor that she regards it as domestic drudgery. She goes through the same round day after day, week after week, with no special marked results. She cannot tell at the close of the day the many little things she has accomplished. Placed beside her husband’s achievement, she feels that she has done nothing worth mentioning.”2

These conclusions might be very common and even natural, but are they accurate or erroneous? And what is it that causes such ideas? Recently, I took a long, hard look at my role as a mother. As a result, I gained a deeper appreciation of my work and discovered just how much fulfillment can come with it. I realized that I can only become discontented with my career if I allow myself to underestimate the value and accomplishment of motherhood. My home and children deserve and need my best efforts, and if I wish to be a success, I need to devote myself completely to motherhood.

“There are opportunities of inestimable worth, interests infinitely precious, committed to every mother. The humble round of duties which women have come to regard as a wearisome task should be looked upon as a grand and noble work. It is the mother’s privilege to bless the world by her influence, and in doing this she will bring joy to her own heart.”3

So how do we change our thinking about our jobs as mothers? My theory is that it is all about education. In fact, I think there should be a college course for homemaking. The course would need to be at least a Bachelor’s degree to cover everything necessary for a qualified homemaker, and it would take about four years to complete. Here are some of the essential unit studies for such a course:

• Psychology

• Nursing

• Economics/Accounting

• Nutrition

• Chef Training

• Teaching

• The Dignity of Motherhood

• Missionary Training

• Patience Development

• Assertiveness

• Scheduling

• Agriculture

• First Aid

• Handyman Skills

• Dressmaking

• Child Care

• Occupational Health & Safety

Believe it or not, a mother uses all of these skills and more in her day-to-day job, and most of it is learned from on-the-job training. It is a real pity that we are not formally trained in any or all of those disciplines. It would make life so much easier if we were, and maybe there would be less dissatisfaction in our profession if it were taken that seriously.

But perhaps just the “Dignity of Motherhood” unit would suffice. It is the most important of all, although is more of a belief system than a skill. It involves who you are: your relationship with God; your education; homemaking skills; and even your attitude to homemaking. It calls for the molding of the character and perceptions, a process that is best begun in early womanhood for the best success (although any time will do). Let’s start with the most important part of mothering: Your relationship with God.